Tuesday, September 26, 2006

The Voice in E's head

42. "Stain Resistant nothin'! I have less stains in my Fruit of the Looms than I do on these Dockers."

Thought to myself on 9/26/06 as I was scrubbing yet another stain out of a pair of my "Stain Resistant" Dockers. Dockers are sponges to any form of defacement.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

The voice in E's head

41. "Man, that's going to leave a mark that shows up in the dark."

Thought but never spoken everytime I give my nephew a wedgie.
Alternate forms:

"Man, that's going to leave a mark that shows up at night."

"Man, that's going to leave a mark that shines at night."

E in Conversation

40. "There is just so much humor, you've got to laugh."

Said to my wife on 12-04-05 as we were watching "Mr. Deeds", starring Adam Sandler.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

The voice in E's head

39. "I begin each new work day making preparations to go back home."

Thought to myself on 10/4/05 as I looked back on my lack of accomplishment during the day.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

E in Conversation

38. "If a word is longer than 8 syllables then it should be called a sentence."

Said on 8/12/05 to my wife after seeing a spelling bee on television. There is no need for just one word to be longer than an average sentence yet these little Pakistani kids were spelling them like they use them in everyday conversation.
Floccinaucinihilipilification? Pleeeeeese! Slap a few spaces in there, some punctuation, and you have a nice paragraph.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

E original word

37. "Shock Joust" (shok)-(joost, judst) also just (just)

1. v, To joust using high voltage cattle prods in lieu of traditional lances.

2. n, An improvised game that came about out of boredom and most often played at frat houses after the tapping of a second or third keg.

Blogged on 8/6/05 in a post about Parapeligic Jousting.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

E in Conversation

36. "Ya, the whole family is popping Zoloft like Pez. No, but hey, what would the characters be on Pez Dispensers if they dispensed Zoloft instead? I'm thinking instead of Bugs Bunny and Spider Man you’d have Charles Manson and Freddy Kruger"

Emailed to my boss on 7/27/05 in response to his implication that my doctor's appointment tomorrow was for the psychiatrist instead of my wife's prenatal visit.

Friday, June 24, 2005

The voice in E's head

35. "Everyone has their own Yoko."

Thought to myself on 6/24/05 as I was listening to the Sex Pistols on XM. I started thinking about the movie"Sid and Nancy" which is about the band's bassist, Sid Vicious, and his girlfriend Nancy Spungen. Nancy introduced Sid to herion and the addiction which followed has been contributed to the bands ultimate break up. Yoko Ono's relationship with John Lennon was also blamed for the Beatles breaking up. And we all have distractions in our lives that seems to move us away from our goals; we have Yokos.